My Pursuit of Happiness

      As you can see from the title, I need help.  It all started the day before school started.  I developed a fever of about 100.5 and my skin felt like it was going to fall off leaving my body raw and inflamed.  I went to an urgent care center where the doctors tested me for COVID, the flu, and a respiratory illness.  They all came back negative.  So, what is causing the fever and the aching skin?  There is only one other explanation: anxiety.  Yup!  In rare cases where anxiety can raise the body temperature.  But on top of all that, my digestive track was not good for over a week and I was not sleeping.  I’m still not sleeping.  I don’t know if my doctor can prescribe I sleep aide or something.       But anyway with all this anxiety and fear and feeling lethargic I needed to take a break from everything.   I withdrew from college life.  My mental health is more important.  My therapis...

      As school is approaching, I am feeling a little apprehensive.  A little?  Try a lot.  I haven’t been in school in over 17 years when I finished my first bachelor’s in music education.  Back then I wasn’t happy with the degree I received.  I had no choices and no interests.  I remember I had a conversation with my mom.  She kind of knew that I wasn’t happy.  This was in my sophomore year.  She mentioned about me changing majors.  I was like, to what?  At that point I had done music for over ten years.  For what interested me was  to get out of school safely and quickly.  The only experience I had, besides music competitions, was working in retail.  I wasn’t happy but it was something to fall back on.       Back in 2009, I did apply to a graduate program at a local university.  But at that time I was developing a sickness that eventually got me kicked out of school.  I ...

   The Four Important Resolutions That Will Benefit You In The Future:                    No matter what your intentions are for the New Year, these resolution, which I'll mention to you, will benefit you in the future health wise.   1.  Getting at least 8 hours of sleep a night.  This allows you to restore and regenerate your body.  I get 12 hours of sleep a night.  I know that seems a lot but my body thanks me for it everyday.   2.  Drink plenty of water.  When you wake up have at least 16 ounces of water because your probably dehydrated first thing in the morning.  A useful tip to see if you're drinking enough is the color of your urine.  If your urine is a gold color your not hydrating enough.  If it's clear your on the right path.   3.  Meditation:  This goes hand in hand with getting enough sleep.  Meditation allows your mind to...

   I have come across people whose eyes are glued to a screen of some sort or they're fingers are typing or texting.  My problem is they're not there at all.  You try to get they're attention, they don't answer.  They talk and act like a robot not knowing how to interact with the human kind.  Plus, cyberspace has there own form of bullying that could cause and depressions and worse  WHY?  Hello out there!  Do you here me?                                      Well, here are my 5 problems with social media: 1.  The first problem is numbers, the need (more so than want) to have more contacts aka followers.  The more followers the more you feel important.  When the number falls you feel like a failure and an outcast. 2  The inability/fear of being yourself.  You feel like you have to create this fictional character to g...

Hello, again!!  It has been a long while since we've gathered together to talk.  I'm so sorry about that.  But things will change such as set up a schedule.  Every Sunday there will be a post talking about health, creativity, law of attraction, the beauty of my home town, etc. Well, with that said, let's get into this week's post: a holistic way of treating mental illness.  If you have a mental illness where you have to take medication you might not be able to get off them.  It might not be safe enough.  But you can create a life style to add to the medicinal regimen to have a healthy way of being.  *This can be for everyone*. I have tried pretty much tried every one on this list.  So here we go: 1.  Don't forget your fruit and veggies.  They are full of antioxidants (cancer fighting), fiber (you need a clean out), vitamin C. 2.  Get up in the morning and have a couple glasses of cold water with lemon juice.  This ...

                               Some might say I should not post about my mental illness on social media.  In fact, I have had people mention it.  The thing is I am not posting for attention or pity, or to reach out, but to educate and strike up a conversation.  I have a friend that planted a seed in my head about talking about my bipolar and depression and how I deal with it on a daily basis.  I just started posting Facebook Live videos on my personal page.  But, I might switch the security settings to public....I don't know....Please leave a comment on what you think.             Right now I am still in the midst of my depression and still undergoing treatment.  I have been dealing with Bipolar and Bipolar Depression for the last 9 years and have b...

   It has been a long while since I have posted anything on this blog.  The reason for this is I had begun to lose touch of who I really was for I was trying to please people and not myself.  In order to reconstruct the image I want for my eyes only (and eventually for others) I had to hit rock bottom (which I did).  I have a secret that I have been hiding from others my whole adult life.  I have Bipolar Type 1 Disorder.        Since the end of April I had been taking on a lot of projects at work, not only my own department but other departments.  When summer came, the pace of my work increased.  My co-workers noticed and decided to add more to my plate.  I did not stop them.  In fact, part of me craved that fast life.  On top of that I would be exercising by hiking/running 8 miles when ever I can without feeling tired.  After working a 9 hour day I would come home to talk i...